Patient or Side Show?

When you already know you’re different physically, and your already very self conscious about yourself and your appearance. It doesn’t help when a doctors finds your differences so interesting they need to call in other doctors to show them. This has happen to me so many times I’ve lost count.

Why can’t a doctor just treat you for what you’re seeing them for with out making you feel like a strange creature on exhibit at museum? The worst of these doctor provoked spectacles was during my first trip to see specialists at Mass General. I had to strip down to my birthday suit and get examined, next thing I knew I had a group of 4 doctors of mixed genders standing in front of me pointing at me and talking to each other. They were speaking English but what was said was so technical it might as well have been a different language. They pointed at my face and jaw line, they manipulated my arms to check my movement; they examined my extremities to check growth and development.

The more they became fascinated with me and all my differences the more and more self conscious I became. I’ve always known I was different because of my condition but these people were pointing out things about me I never even noticed. Things no other doctors had ever bothered to tell me, it got to me and I really started getting scared and upset. At some point I guess they finally noticed the fear on my face and they called the creature show to an end. All but one doctor left and the doctor who stayed behind did their best to calm me and explain the things they were discussing. It didn’t help. I left mass general feeling more self conscious then ever before in my life! It was rough! I know I’m different and there isn’t anything I can do about it. I wish I was normal! I wish I could magically fix all my problems both physically and mentally but it’s not medically possible.

A note to all doctors out there… Don’t make your patients feel like a freak show! It makes them extremely self conscious and anti social, Trust me I know! I’m not really sure how to end this rant except to say thank you to all those who have stood by me and who have not treated me differently, to say thanks to all those who haven’t passed judgment on me for things about me that are out of my control. These people don’t need to be named, they know who they are. To them I offer my sincerest Thank You! To everyone else I say… Who the hell are you to pass judgment on me? I’m a nice guy who just has a few problems and of you can’t see past them ... it’s your loss!